Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Ugh. Lets go crawl into a dairy-gluten-chlamydia free hole somewheres.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
