You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
do to the flooding of the park, there will be a midnight bikini mud wrestling party behind my dorm. all are welcome.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I pour the whiskey from now on
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
