We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
