Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
these marshmallows taste like mayonnaise. like playing tetris on a gameboy, that's what these marshmallows mean.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize
