Texts From Last Night

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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I'm going to jail i love you

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  (703): I'm going to jail i love you http://tfl.nu/f32n
  Replies (16) Good night (1210) Bad night (1689)
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  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out

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  (306): Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out http://tfl.nu/kvs3
  Replies (5) Good night (786) Bad night (918)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here

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  (703): At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here http://tfl.nu/z46s
  Replies (17) Good night (2300) Bad night (712)
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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.

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  (910): I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through. http://tfl.nu/z33k
  Replies (14) Good night (2192) Bad night (4750)
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  (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.

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  (484): I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet. http://tfl.nu/aaoq
  Replies (1) Good night (1102) Bad night (1733)
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  (908): View more from New Jersey

  Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate

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  (908): Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate http://tfl.nu/t9ao
  Replies (3) Good night (2433) Bad night (996)
• Favorite

  (714): View more from California

  My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin

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  (714): My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin http://tfl.nu/22om
  Replies (10) Good night (2026) Bad night (910)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."

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  (248): There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding." http://tfl.nu/ytsu
  Replies (5) Good night (1867) Bad night (1240)
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.

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  (952): She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high. http://tfl.nu/dd7j
  Replies (2) Good night (944) Bad night (642)
• Favorite

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."

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  (864): Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy." http://tfl.nu/9d84
  Replies (18) Good night (794) Bad night (1968)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.

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  (312): Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag. http://tfl.nu/6eu4
  Replies (2) Good night (957) Bad night (561)
• Favorite

  (813): View more from Florida

  I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight

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  (813): I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight http://tfl.nu/hz5m
  Replies (4) Good night (559) Bad night (385)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe

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  (815): Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe http://tfl.nu/9pv6
  Replies (1) Good night (428) Bad night (396)
• Favorite

  (217): View more from Illinois

  He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "

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  (217): He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick " http://tfl.nu/w39y
  Replies (2) Good night (767) Bad night (359)
• Favorite

  (270): View more from Kentucky

  I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.

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  (270): I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes. http://tfl.nu/yqer
  Replies (0) Good night (335) Bad night (396)

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