loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
