How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Randomize
