I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
If my birthday doesn't end with my panties hanging from a ceiling fan, I'm holding you responsible.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
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