Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
GM filed for bankruptcy, all the dealerships closed, and it's june and I'm in jeans and a sweatshirt and I'm cold. What is the point of living in this state anymore?
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Randomize
