is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
Land Before Time marathon. we drink every time littlefoot almost eats a treestar.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
