Right on... I dropped my chapstick
I blacked out
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Sorry I threw up all over your Lyft.
It's ok I woke up next to a dumpster.
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
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