I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
