I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
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