I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
do herpes really smell.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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