lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
