Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
...oh my god that's like anal suicide
I'm aware. I'm writing the eulogy for my colon as we speak.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
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