Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
Randomize
