i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
