if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
At first I was confused when I woke up with shards of glass and pickle brine in my pants. But then I remembered I hung out with you last night.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
My inner 10 year old alcoholic is intrigued.
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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