I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Does the girl you just banged want anything from Taco Bell?
Cover for me. Stopped at Chris’ for a quickie. Broke a high heel and there’s jizz all over my black dress. Fuck pornstars for making workday sex look easy
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