i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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