You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
Let's paint friendship bongs
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
