who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
My Wonder Woman lingerie has been defiled by man. I'm a horrible Amazon.
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
We are all done wearing pants today
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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