I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Randomize
