Texts From Last Night

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  (304): View more from West Virginia

  apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...

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  (304): apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training... http://tfl.nu/a5eu
  Replies (36) Good night (4288) Bad night (849)
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat

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  (412): I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat http://tfl.nu/4f5y
  Replies (6) Good night (3042) Bad night (770)
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology

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  (313): i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology http://tfl.nu/1r1t
  Replies (10) Good night (4952) Bad night (934)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably

  (1-404): View more from Georgia

  No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars

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  (404): Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably (1-404): No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars http://tfl.nu/q62q
  Replies (6) Good night (5741) Bad night (688)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.

  (715): View more from Wisconsin

  We should party with her soon

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  (651): She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death. (715): We should party with her soon http://tfl.nu/q1hq
  Replies (17) Good night (8659) Bad night (1324)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.

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  (404): It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning. http://tfl.nu/70c1
  Replies (14) Good night (5301) Bad night (1495)
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  (386): View more from Florida

  You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?

  (1-386): View more from Florida

  Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.

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  (386): You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...? (1-386): Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge. http://tfl.nu/modl
  Replies (31) Good night (2852) Bad night (5563)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.

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  (+44): Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand. http://tfl.nu/fdqs
  Replies (22) Good night (8834) Bad night (1032)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station

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  (480): my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station http://tfl.nu/uhsm
  Replies (4) Good night (2061) Bad night (1352)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?

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  (813): I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2? http://tfl.nu/8h9n
  Replies (16) Good night (1857) Bad night (938)
• Favorite

  (850): View more from Florida

  your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.

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  (850): your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing. http://tfl.nu/7ema
  Replies (11) Good night (818) Bad night (1828)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"

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  (402): The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?" http://tfl.nu/ovas
  Replies (11) Good night (799) Bad night (1508)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  Why am I feeling up grandma?!

  (312): View more from Illinois

  I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.

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  (248): Why am I feeling up grandma?! (312): I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text. http://tfl.nu/znfl
  Replies (2) Good night (1418) Bad night (617)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport

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  (317): Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport http://tfl.nu/wqk2
  Replies (3) Good night (1080) Bad night (315)
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  (323): View more from California

  Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis

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  (323): Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis http://tfl.nu/u0al
  Replies (3) Good night (597) Bad night (300)

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