Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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