OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Randomize
