Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
I just closed two deals on my laptop from my bathroom while smoking a bowl, like a bawssss. Working from home is my favorite.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
Randomize
