I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I mean it's not my fault he had a floor mat that read "put out or get out". What was I supposed to do?
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
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