My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
