I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
I hate when I'm sexting and I make a typo.
You just killed the sext mood.
Randomize
