Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
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