the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Randomize
