Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
im just glad that if you were going to have awkward hospital sex, you would want it with me
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
You didn't say, "No." And you stole more than half of my Snickers. You owed me that dick.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
