the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well... He is a good looking man underneath all the fat and muff.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
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