At least make sure they are 18
Why
I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize
