By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I literally just saw a campus policeman riding a Segway pull over a moving car. you should just give up.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I need to reevaluate. My boss gave me drug money. I overslept on my couch. And I had my student teacher go to McDonald's and get an egg mcmuffin for me.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
