yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
I came so hard my ears popped.
Randomize
