You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Randomize
