omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
i think i need to institute a "if your dick has been in my mouth this year i get a xmas present" policy
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Sharted again. Stuck in traffic. Fuck
Randomize
