I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
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