im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
I dont think I should be allowed to pick my own boyfriends anymore
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Im glad your laughing because im currently convincing my penis you didnt mean it and its all gunna be ok.
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