But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
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