Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
being sober in physics class makes me realize the regularity with which i show up to it still drunk
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
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