we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
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