i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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