Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
The carpet cleaning people refuse to steam clean human feces. I'll call back later and blame it on the dog not you
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
Randomize
