I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I think people are normalizing furries
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