Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
Randomize
