Would you feel weird if I asked out ___?
You dont call on our son's bday but you want to know if I'll give you permission to date my best friend?
So...no?`
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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